History

2 months into the first UK lockdown and relentlessly our hair continued to grow with no chance to properly control it as the barber and the hairdresser were shut. It was beginning to show!

This song was inspired by an observation that a TV weatherman’s usual short and immaculate haircut was looking particularly bushy and thus, very apparent.

As with Hambu Lodo, the proceeds from this song were donated to NHS Charities Together.

Lyrics

OH NO THE BARBER’S SHUT AND THE HAIRDRESSER LOCKED THE DOOR
IF THE THATCH GROWS OVER THE EYES AND THE EARS, GET THE SHEARS AND COVER THE FLOOR
BUT THOSE THAT ARE SHORN MAYBE BREAKING THE RULES
OR ELSE HAVE SOMEONE AT HOME WITH THE TOOLS
AND THE SKILL TO DO A HALF-DECENT JOB
OF A SHORT BACK AND SIDES OR A C-19 BOB
BOB BOB CROP THE BOB
OH WE’RE ALL CROSSING OVER TO THE HAIRY ZONE

SO THE PERFECT GROOMING OF THE TV TALENT
FAILS OVER TIME WITH THEIR HAIR APPARENT
AS IT CROSSES OVER, CROSSES OVER TO THE HAIRY ZONE

YOU KNOW AT SOMETIME IN THE FUTURE THEY MAY GIVE A WRY SMILE AND SAY THERE WAS A NEW, UNRULY HAIR STYLE THAT DEFINED THE TIMES AND, FOR IT’S CRIMES AGAINST THE CROP, THAT CAME TO BE KNOWN AS THE VIRUS MOP.